don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
do you still have a key to my apartment? Without going into too much detail locked myself out naked on the patio, currently using a deck cushion to cover myself so kids walking home from school dont see me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
One minute we were playing beer pong, and the next minute I was sprinting to my apartment with a watermelon. wtf happened in between?
Who told you that acid and Jurassic World was a good idea?
dont remember, but I'm pretty sure I was convinced that the hybrid dinosaur was satan the whole time. It was actually very spiritual
I'm going to preface tonight by saying that I'm sorry for tequila, shopping carts, and having to chase me.
I found my wallet. Still have no idea when I put mad dog in my steel water bottle, though...
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
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