We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
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My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
I just told my sister I love her. I'm in no condition to drive.
So I saw the nuva ring just lying on the counter at Planned Parenthood...did u know it's just a ring? I could go to the Dollar tree buy a plastic bracelet and shove it up there instead.
You do that. Then go have lots of unprotected with your harem of booty calls and see how that works out for you.
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
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just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
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