Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
Ambien. No doubt about it.
I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
I remember us getting kicked out of the bar, but neither of us know why. We woke up next to chicken bones on a plate with spoons, and my car has mud all over it including places where feet shouldn't be, like the speakers on the car door.
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
I woke up in a chipotle parking lot with an industrial sized box of condoms and a bag of dounut holes. I need Jesus
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
Randomize
