Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
You insisted that your middle name was "velociraptor" for 20 minutes and every time someone said something you tried to relate it to velociraptors. That kind of drunk.
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
You’d probably be happy to know that I think I’ve mastered the skill of knowing “my type” and then steering clear
FINALLY. I THOUGHT THIS DAY WOULD NEVER COME!
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
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