What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
I wasted some perfectly good semen on her
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
Can u please come get me. My car keys are gone. Somehow I ended up sleeping in my trunk
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
She pulled vodka outta the dryer and told me to drink it
Just jerked off with bubble wrap. Not as awesome as it sounds.
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
If you can handle my post-party look you da real MVP
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
Randomize
