it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
I am thankful for thumbs.
Because without thumbs, we would be dolphins.
Land dolphins.
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
Not sure what time I'll be home. I'm currently topless and the damn stripper won't give me my clothes back
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
as a side note pls kill me
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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