nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
I tried doing a handstand in the middle of the bar and I ended up kicking this old guy in the face and broke his glasses. Thats how I got kicked out
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
there is nothing like a happy birthday present when you wake up with a bow on your vagina.
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
Power went out. She lit a candle and gave me head. Made some pretty impressive candlelight cocksucking shadowpuppets. Must be what porn was like in olden times.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
I'm trying to watch Chicago PD and tell you I like your dick at the same time. It's a lot of work, ok?
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
Sitting in my junior high parking lot high on ambien talking to a stranger I met on tinder. What is life?
Randomize
