What tipped you off? The sombrero?
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
Dear female. Happy valentines day. If you have not had the pleasure of making love to me, please do not fret, I will get around to it soon enough. If you indeed have made love to me, then bravo, wasn't that grand! Perhaps we should do it again? Regardless, have a good day. This has been a public service announcement. Rock on.
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
Props to the guy blatantly doing coke in the bathroom at the bar. Walked out of the stall with a credit card in hand, sniffing loudly and shouting "choo choo"
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
You had me at "let me see your balls"
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
Randomize
