I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
Can you please check on Jay? He just called and left a Backstreet Boys song on my voicemail. Either it's 1998, or someone needs to go back to rehab.
all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
I'm getting offered Candy Crush lives in return for sex. Like wtf.
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
How exactly does a handjob become fancy?
Blueberry lube, and champagne.
Randomize
