Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
My parole officer gave me condoms and a Starbucks gift card ... happy holidays.
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
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