One girl and one boy is just not enough.
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
please dont pick me up from the airport dressed like a terrorist.
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
i just remembered i chipped my tooth last night when i pulled up your pants zipper with my teeth
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
doing an easter egg hunt in a liquor store right now. i feel so adult
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
Life is my bitch right now. The bouncers tried to carry me out of the club, but everyone thought I was crowd surfing so everyone carried me BACK IN. Winning as fuck.
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
Then she looked me straight in the eyes and asked me if I missed my foreskin. Weirdest conversation ever.
You were drunkenly dancing with a statue you affectionately referred to as "The Captain." I wasn't going to deny your happiness.
Randomize
