that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
buying my parents vodka for Christmas is like buying a normal person socks.
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
Oh. My. God. It is NOT okay to drink Johnny Walker when there is no Jameson. My skull is eating my brain.
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
Randomize
