I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
That awful moment when there is no more beer and you find yourself considering tequila and aloe juice.
No other awkward car ride can beat the one you give your drug dealer home.
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
Nothing like ripping open the box with your keys on a sat R train and throwing back the morning after pill with some coconut water on my way to work at a fitness studio for free
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
Randomize
