when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
i'm pretty sure the devil's penis is california-shaped
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
So "I hate myself Mondays" has extended to Tuesday this week. I just had peanut butter and a glass of wine for lunch.
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
I just wrote the Drag Queen from Saturday Night on FB and apologized for licking her. Weirdest thing I have ever typed...
Did I, at any point last night, say I was dying?
By 9 pm this evening I'll have accomplished smashing with two different guys in two different time zones in the same day.
Stay hydrated
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
Just so you know sleeping with you is like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
That's the most romantic thing I've ever heard
Randomize
