Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
Mom and Dad are dead. Trust fund
Just rolled over and found your boyfriend in bed with me. Is mine at your house?
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
The 12 year old son winked and made eyes at me while his father fed me vodka gummy bears. Gameday yo
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
I made him laugh his dick is mine
He’s like Batman if Batman went down on me and gave me multiple toe curling orgasms. He left without saying a word before I pulled the pillow off my face
Find out if he’s shared his techniques with a friend and set me up with him. You know I’ve always had a thing for Robin!!!!
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