No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
Masterbating to gospel music is like god cheering on your orgasm
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
You know how you thought that you put on a condom last weel?
yea
turns out that you did...and i just found it.
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
My new years resolution is to be alive new years morning
Just bought a pack of cigs...gas station guy informed me i took off my underwear and tried to pop a squat by the milk last night...
A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
He told me the color of his piss. Worst. First date. Ever.
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
wait did i hook up with someone in mcdonalds last night?
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
Randomize
