shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I love you more than champagne and correct grammar
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
Beer. Pizza. Seething Rage. I will be full of two of these things tonight. You get to decide which two.
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
Randomize