don't wear any deodorant. we have to do everything we can to sabotage this wedding
I hope the prosecutor is a dude cause my lawyer is hot.
Best thing law school has taught me: how to use logic to turn a girls "no I will not have sex with you" into "well I might as well get laid"
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
Life Lesson #1 of 2013: double-fisting shower beers and shaving my bikini line should be reserved for two different showers.
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
Married dude I had an affair with 10yrs ago was at table next to us at dinner last nite. My mom asked him to take a pic of us & then commented how cute he was as they left. Do I tell her he’s got a huge D too?
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
Randomize