a very overweight girl in the ER just said she trippped over the invisible wii jump rope and fell
i think my mom watched the whole time
Look dude I'm sorry I used your bong to snorkel in my bathtub last night
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
I just saw a douchebag with frosted tips & a LaCoste polo with popped collar driving a Call of Duty edition Jeep. It was a cavalcade of stereotypes.
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The length of my leg hair is a constant reminder of how long it's been since I even thought I had a chance of getting laid.
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
I just had a dream that I was fighting Donald Trump... Gotta stop watching the news before bed
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
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