We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
Waking up next to a 3 inch puddle of water in my kitchen with a bathing suit on...what the fuck went on lastnight
Why are there chunks of your hair in everyones pocket?
I decided to mark my territory.
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
You know you're high when you find yourself sitting on the floor with the refrigerator door open, talking to various foods. Hand gestures and all.
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
Riddle me this: why did I wake up next to a stuffed sword fish?
So turns out my new assistant isn't really my assistant. The owner needed a title for his FWB so his wife wouldn't catch on. I got a three hundred a month credit limit boost on my corporate credit card instead.
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