party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
I just slow jerked to the titanic theme song, i dont think theres enough alcohol in the state to get me over her tonight
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
Randomize
