where are you
in your bedroom
how did you get in
your wife…
WTF
do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
So I just almost came on my own face I had to dodge it as it was flying by...that was a first
I just set a weed brownie on fire in the microwave.
Successful day.
i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
Bought pregnancy tests in bulk off amazon. Kinda feel insulted that it asked if I wanted to subscribe for regular shipments.
So, no matter what happens today, hold on to this. At least you're not naked under your ex husband's trench coat being stopped by the police who also work with your ex husband. Long story. Actually, not a long story. That's it.
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
I’ve been home 1 day and already had sex with my ex and got a blowie from her cousin and currently I’m getting molested by a cougar at the bar!!!! Plenty to give thanks for this year!!!!
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