your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
Successfully pulled the houdini tonight. Check that off my list.
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
I mean what are real friends for if they won't hold down your wedding dress to allow for a keg stand
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
The number of threesomes I have agreed to seems to increase every time I talk to you drunk...
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
There is a pool of ranch salad dressing in my purse...I know thats always been something you've wanted to try..so don't even act like you didn't do this.
I woke up handcuffed to a bed wearing nothing but an army belt. Does this count as thanking our country?
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
Do you ever look at your life and go "i'm too sober for this bullshit"?
Every day of my life.
Randomize
