It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
You made a "martini" bagel. Took a bagel dunked it in vodka and put olives in it
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
these are times I'm glad I'm Jewish because the Torah is just like "drink, eat, and fuck"
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
Randomize