just heard the best thing ever: calling people's kids "fuck trophies"
they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
she just uttered the sweetest sentence in the english language...my stripper friends are coming over
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We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
I'm sorry. We set two Christmas trees on fire. Also the neighbor's yard. Also ours.
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
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It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
Turns out he's not a Doctor Who fan, I mumbled Alons-y as I went down on him. He asked who Alan was. No more drunk sex for me!