Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
yeah that always happens. i'm like the where's waldo of parties. i never even know where the fuck i'm at.
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
I finally fell asleep and like an hour later he wakes me up and says "I've always to be woken up w a blowjob." Um, that's not how it works asshole.
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
Did you actually just quote Ace Ventura during a sext!?
You know it
Dammit now I have to marry you
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
It's not my fault I make her feel like a Taylor Swift album
Its the damn oven. I think it wants to eat me.
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
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