So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
Just got back from doctors appt. He lied. It wasn't a pimple on his dick.
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
I already banned bobbing for apples. While drunk that's just drowning near fruit.
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
Some girl at my gym just tried to casually drop the fact she can kegel 3 lbs...
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
I called you last night? What did I say??
That you love me forever and that I'm the greatest in the world now mohammed ali is dead...
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
Randomize
