when you find your car can you pick me up? his mom is here and im hungover
thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
Fourth time I had to be woken up in the line of Whataburger in two weeks. First time my shirt was free of vomit.
do you find it slutty that the last person I had sex with is also the person who sings my ringtone ?
You just squeezed a person out of you and I'm drunks at 2PM. Our lives got traded and you know it and you're jealous.
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
He texts me "what are you wearing" in the middle of the workday, so naturally I assume he's kidding and respond "the blood of my enemies" #foreveralone
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize
