she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
So right when I was pulling her underwear off with my teeth, she told me, "Stick your penis in my 'nanners." Needless to say, there was no penis-'nanner interaction.
What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
Dear God. I kissed a man tonight who was born in 1936.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty sure the girl in the stall next to me is waiting on me to leave so she can poop but I'm doing the same thing so it's like a Mexican standoff
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
He? As in you personified your dick?
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
Randomize