You were wearing a sombrero. And a crown. And told me to use the nerf gun to protect your room from the cat. You don't have a cat.
yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
you drew a penis with ranch dressing. tried to take a picture of it and dropped your phone in it. Then made moaning sounds while you licked it off.
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
Let me just inform you of my purse contents right now. Three cum rags, a sock full of cum, xanax, and a fake moustache. This is my life.
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
I slapped a guy during sex last night because he moaned the wrong name. Then I remembered I gave him a fake name. Sorry bro.
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
Randomize
