Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
The good news is the house is clean, the bad news is someone redecorated the bonus room by spray painting "free willy" on the wall in honor of the girl who passed out in there last night.
I let my cat eat the pepperonis off of my pizza while I was still eating it. That's the level of tequila drunk I got last night.
God I adore you.
...I think i just fell in love with a random undergrad at first glance. He was the awkward young adult version of captain hook. Dear god i need to get off this campus.
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
Xanax, wine, and giving the neighbor blue balls. How about you?
Jesus, it’s Tuesday morning! Not back stage with Motley Crew
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
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