Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
When the tupperware hit the highway it was like a vomit bomb
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
I taught a straight girl about grindr today. She showed me tinder. It was like some sexual cultural exchange program
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
Welp just ran into my high school history teacher while buying a pregnancy test...there goes my veil of innocence in this town.
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
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