How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
woke up this morning with a fat chick but she went downstairs and made pancakes without saying a word.
According to google history I spent most of last night trying to buy an elephant.
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
I bought new panties to console myself ... you know, because I am going to lose my ovaries. Well, if I don't die of a heart attack first. But at least when the EMS folks find me, I'll be finely dressed from the waist down.
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
Dont care about too tired for sex, thank you for leaving your laser pointer. I have now determined both my cats are stupid.
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
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