I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
I just woke up from quarter beer tuesdays wearing 3 pairs of underwear, none of which are the ones I left wearing...2 Around my waist and one around my shoulder in an attempt at a bra. At least drunk me tries to be decent?
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
Growing a beard is gonna make smoking a pipe look so much more majestic
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
I’ll call you later. There’s a jilted trophy wife looking for a revenge fuck at my door
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