He broke up with me by playing Lynyrd Skynyrd "Free Bird".
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
Just bumped into my ex. Blowing a dude in the ladies' room at Disney World. I guess it really was her not me.
I just blacked back in and I'm at a kids birthday party in a suit and people are calling me uncle Carl. Never having your homemade liquor again.
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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