hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
I think my vagina is haunted
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
Yeah but I was the kid who ran over your BMW and is banging your 15 year old daughter... There isn't a cool enough dad in the world to make that work.
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
Fun fact: drinking me now steals weaponry
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
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