I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
Just bought koolaid for my vodka in a DARE shirt with my NES wallet. I'm everything I thought I'd be when I was 8.
Except even better, boobs get discounts.
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
i woke up with a shamrock tattoo on my wrist and a fat bruise on my hipbone. please tell me its not real.
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
Randomize
