return my video game
Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
I had to show the prof your text saying that I could pick up your midterm for you. I covered the part of the screen saying you weren't there because you were about to have morning choke sex.
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.