Whats the opposite of morning wood? Whatever its called, everyone saw it when it fell out.
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
He told me he breastfed 'til he was six. That explains the obsession with me getting fake tits. Is it a red flag?
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
I HAVE A BLACK EYE FROM A DILDO!! IM GETTING MARRIED TOMORROW! THIS IS NOT A MISSUNDERSTANDING!
He saw one of my bras on the floor and said "damn you could eat soup out of this"
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
At some point the phrase "I've hit rock bottom" stopped having a meaning and became my general state of life
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
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