do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
jacking off on stolen wireless... gotta enjoy the small things in life
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
Yeah. He can't come because his mom found the pizza box under his bed with my underwear in it. He acted confused, guess because i forgot to tell him..
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
Randomize
