GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
Who invented hangovers? And why did I make out with him and eat an entire can of chilli mixed with hot fries while screaming "YOU ONLY GRADUATE ONCE" last night?
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
I could run a drunk marathon in heels
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
we were all too drunk to realize that the cat wasnt yours
Randomize
