she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
Apparently I whispered "Jesus was here" and bailed out of the moving taxi.
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
Met Dan at the park for lunch and the guy parked next to us was getting a BJ the entire time. Way to make me feel like an inadequate girlfriend, random park skank. All Dan got was a double cheeseburger and a large iced tea...
I just had sex in the men's bathroom of a Chinese buffet...
YOU ARE MY HERO
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
Randomize
