She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
Thanks for the menagerie of condoms on my desk
It's the use of SAT words like that which make me want to use them on you
so all the bums hang out by my new store, they have a leader we call king bum... He got dethroned by police today for choking out a hooker. The bum heirarchy is in shambles right now.
You can't just send the picture of my vagina back to me, 2 months after we broke up, and make small talk out of it.
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
the last thing i remember is yelling at the cab driver that i'm really good at drive by vomitting.
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
The power of my boobs compel you
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
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