Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
i just overheard someone saying that they invented the 'tequila mockingbird' last night. sorry, but i found better friends
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
Tonight when I'm getting a bj from a stripper I'm gonna imagine it's you bobbing down there
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
I just realized I consumed seven different types of alcohol this weekend. And I'm only counting jungle juice as one of those. How the fuck did I not die?
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
Two words: blizzard sex
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
Randomize
