I faked an abortion last night.
Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
Is a box of franzia too insincere of a gift for "i'm sorry I backed into your toddler with my car"?
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
Not only did she fulfill a life long dream of mine of banging in a library, she bought me subway for lunch. I feel like I got the best gold star ever today.
the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
