i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
Since when does a beard not count as proof of age at the liquor store?
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
She just came home holding a fire hydrant. Yes a fire hydrant.
She called to say her plane was running late and i had 30minutes to get to the airport for bathroom sex
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
Randomize
