how much do you want to bet that her wedding invites will be vera bradley themed? loser has to frame theirs.
Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
So, halfway through sex he stops and starts crying. He said he's worried god hates him for all his bad decisions...think he meant to imply I was one of them...
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
On the way out the door to work grabbed the wine glass on the floor left for the ghost of Elijah and chugged it. PASSOVER.
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
He has a British accent. He could read me the phone book and I would come so hard he would need a wizened old man in a rowboat to save him.
This chick walked up to me in the bar and started making out with me, then grabbed my drink while I wasn't looking and walked off.
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
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