garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks.
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
On your way out, lock the front door. And by lock the front door, I mean find the door handle, reattach it, and then lock it.
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
I'm gonna take my bong and hot box the pirate ship in the daycare playground.
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
Current status: so high that I'm unable to have coherent conversation with my mom, but still knew that when my dad said "shpritzy white stuff" I understood that he was trying to think of "whipped cream."
That text took me 10 minutes.
I'm literally naked with a whole pizza in my lap sitting in my chair.
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
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