His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me
I just found your credit card inside the bag of chips
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
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