come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
During sex she told me I could do anything I wanted to her. You remember that toy lightsaber we bought at Wal Mart?
We made a drinking game out of poaching eggs. When did our life turn into a really awesome version of Top Chef?
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
If I come home tho and find u passed out naked in my bed with the bottle of crown empty, we're gonna have issues.
I'm sorry, I can't help the fact that I like to sleep naked, and I like booze, together it looks bad, yes.
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
My now ex hook up buddy realized I was hooking up with others when she saw my spotify sex playlist making appearances on fb. fml
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
how drunk are you?
Several
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
Randomize
