belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
So some girl kept staring at me and giving me these weird looks. That's when I realized she could probably hear the Mulan soundtrack playing on my iPod...
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
I think the waitress doesn't beleive I have friends coming. I've had 4 drinks and a large salad just waiting for you guys.
I no longer question where these bruises come from... between the strip pole in the living room, the slipnslide in the hallway and our constant level of intoxication I will always be bruised...
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
Fuckbuddy couldn't meet, so she's trying to find a substitute to come fuck me. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
They only knew me as the lesbian that passed out in a bathtub. That's not what you call friendship.
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
My dad is sitting where you rode me
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
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